Reply to Lack of spousal support when needed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Every few years, there is a life challenge where I need some emotional support from DW. A few years ago, it was a family member’s sudden death which was a major shock to me. Last month, the company I work for went out of business, so I am looking for a new job. I have a great skill set and will find a new position no problem - already have a ton of interviews scheduled. 
In both situations, I feel like my DW doesn’t really give me the support I need.  She made/makes me feel like my needing her is an interruption to her social life. Like drinking with her friends is more important than being there for me emotionally. I feel like both times I have needed her in the past five years, she hasn’t truly been there for me. 
Has anyone else dealt with something like this?  Do I have a terrible relationship?  
I am just so sad as I come to the realization that this person I love doesn’t give me the support I need in the very rare instances when I actually need it. [/quote]

Sorry OP, you’re on your own.  First off - the DCUM harpies will find a way to make this your fault.  There is a lot of misandry here.

Second, don’t rely on you wife for supper.  It’s not going to happen.  She isn’t going to be the rock you can lean against, because that doesn’t bring value to the marriage in her eyes.  I suffer and still suffer from bad depression, PTSD and have been suicidal.  While the suicidal thoughts are gone, I’m still struggling sometimes and would love some support.  It hadn't happened in two years and I don’t expect it to happen.  She left me alone to deal with my own issue without consideration.  It sucks when the person who is supposed to love you doesn’t want to help.   You wouldn’t be the first man to say this either.  For my wife, our kid is first then her job, then her family.  I’m not on the list of priorities at all.  Most times I tell her I need help  she just leaves the room.

Long story short, no rely on her for help, women are terrible with that and I could tell you stories with other men I know that dealt with it.  Seek help with a therapist or some really good friends.  That’s all I can offer.  If you need some to talk to or need a place to go to feel like you’re cared about there’s places like the. and veterans groups. If you’re not a vet, find a local group for depression and stuff.

I get it, you feel alone and unloved.  It sucks man.  Don’t do what I did for so long and essentially ask or beg for some help and not get any.  It won’t come.  You’ll have to seek it out somewhere else [/quote]

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