Reply to Dad told us tween was rude and doesn't want anymore visits- how to handle?

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[quote=Anonymous]
It all depends on whether the child was purpusefully rude or not. I highly doubt he was, but this is a point you should clear up at once as it changed the consequences.

My kids are 8 and 13 and can be inconsistent with their expressions of gratitude and manners, particularly the 8 year old, but also, more rarely, the 13 year old. This is developmentally normal, and doesn’t mean they are not appreciative. Neighbors and friends have commented on how polite my kids are, but they have their moments, and that’s OK.

Your son should thank your father’s wife in a nice letter, or by phone, and apologize for not doing so during his stay. I would NOT apologize to your father, he is not the injured party and completely overeacted. I would not try to get your son invited by himself again. Your father might be the type to change his mind, especially if he hears his grandkid is having fun with his ex. But you don’t need to push them into a relationship if your father is so prickly and sensitive. To be completely honest, if he were my father, I would explain the above in no uncertain terms!

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