Reply to Rude to ask if someone is a boy or a girl?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I discourage my kids from asking that question head-on, for exactly the reason a PP mentioned - it insinuates that the other child is not doing gender correctly.

I also think it is okay for my child to live with curiosity. They should learn now that they don't "NEED" to know someone else's gender identity in order to play with them, and that their own curiosity about someone else's gender, or racial background, or anything else doesn't justify rude questions.

[/quote]

This is interesting because I'm an adult and adults ask me about my racial identify all the time. I'm half something so my non-white half could be any variety of origins based on my physical appearance. I have learned to respond to the question gracefully because the people aren't asking out of malice, they are asking purely out of curiosity. To respond with anything other than a graceful answer would be unfortunate.

If it weren't important to people to be identified correctly, then there wouldn't be such thing as him/his/he in email tag lines. I would say that it is more important for those who's gender might not be readily identifiable to be identified correctly. 7 year olds don't have email pronoun lines to make it clear. Sometimes you have to ask. And, the child whose gender is fluid or does not match private parts might have to learn early on how to answer that question gracefully. This doesn't mean that anyone is going to make a fuss. Transparency leads the way to acceptance. Quiet whispering does not.[/quote]

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