Reply to How to stop teen boy trolling behavior

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I told my son, "Yes it is your right to say whatever you want. But I am sad and ashamed to hear a child of mine saying these things."

He said it was just a joke, and I said "yeah, I understand that it is just a joke, but I don't like that you are saying it, and I don't want to hear a child of mine saying things like this, not in my house and not in front of me. I can't control what you say to your friends, but I don't think it is right to say these things even as a joke."[/quote]

That might be okay for run of the mill swearing but op is describing something more serious. Would you advocate this same weary-shrug response if he was saying the n-word? He's a minor under her care and she should respond more strongly than "I don't like that" if it's really offensive, out of the mainstream of teen surliness stuff. [/quote]

Run of the mill swearing, I don't even comment on.  The above I used when my son was calling someone "retarded".

We have also had the conversation about the n- word.  My son is one of the only white kids in his class, with all the other kids being AA and he hears the n- word ALL THE TIME being used by his black classmates.  He doesn't understand why I won't allow him to use it at home, in the same way his classmates use it, and he says times have changed and I don't get it.  No, he doesn't get beat up by his black classmates for using the word.  But I tell him nevertheless not to use it at home, where I can hear it, but I admit to being shrug weary about the whole thing.[/quote]

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