Reply to 11 yo DD sneaking sweets

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Thank you for this. It is by far the most helpful and more accurate read on the situation. I am not tracking food but realize it’s been eaten when I go to get it. It feels like “sneaking” because other snacks she’ll eat when I am around. I never see her eating the treats unless we’re eating dessert together. I’ve found the wrappers in her room or in other odd places that she’s stashed them. She’s free to get any food any time but I do ask her to just let me know if it might be near meals or if we’re running low or if she wants me to get same or different snacks.  She’s told me that she feels unhealthy when eating sweets & assure her that she/our family lives a healthy life so all foods including sweets are fine. She has mood issues with too much sugar & that’s why I want her to ask or let me know.  I say yes unless it’s close to meal time. [/quote]

I'm sorry but I feel confident that you have somehow created the idea in her head that sweets = bad, and therefore she feels she has to hide it.  This may have been totally inadvertent. You may talk about weight and food in relation to your own body without noticing it, or you may make a big show out of the fact that you refrain from sweets yourself.   There is something about how you handle food, weight, or body image that she has picked up on. [/quote]

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