Reply to How to handle--better boundaries or do I just need to let go?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Another, slightly outside the box, suggestion.  Maybe your immediate family and your DH's sibling's immediate family can plan a vacation together where FIL and his GF can drop in.  Get a beach house with room for everyone (if that's possible for you all).  FIL and GF can stay at a nearby hotel if they prefer.  Cousins have bonding time.  FIL has grandpa time.  GF can check out if she needs/wants to.

Sometimes it's easier when no one is on their home turf.[/quote]

NP here and that's a great idea.

My guess is faux-MIL just gets stressed hosting kids and/or a lot of people in general. As my grandmother (a widow) got older, we stopped celebrating family events at her house as we always had. First we tried to reduce her (unfounded) stress level by having everyone bring a dish.. but even that got too much for her, so we just celebrated the events at someone else's house and someone came to pick her up and take her there (she couldn't drive). That worked out better for everyone. No stress for her, and she got to see her family.[/quote]

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