Reply to S/O locking spouse out of bedroom or "requiring" spouse to sleep on couch

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "S/O locking spouse out of bedroom or "requiring" spouse to sleep on couch"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH here.  DW can always outlast me in a fight.  No matter how exhausted she is, she'll keep yelling, and keep escalating.  Not great at controlling her emotions.  Best case scenario is she cries herself to sleep.

On the flip side, if I'm pissed at her, I'll go sleep in the guest room, and lock the door.  Sure, she could (and does occasionally) unlock it with a paper clip, but it's a strong message that I'm disengaging and won't keep fighting.  I have never locked her out of our room.

Not a perfect solution, but better than the alternative given she can't control her anger and emotions.  Occasionally, if she knows she is at fault, she will calm down, unlock the door after I've fallen asleep, and get in the guest room bed with me and sleep there.  [/quote]

So, when she is upset about something, your response is to completely disengage, then wonder why she continues to escalate?  She wants to talk to you.  It doesn't sound to me like either of you are good at controlling your emotions.  It just looks different when you feel out of control.  [/quote]

People with good coping skills will not "continue to talk" once emotions are high.

Getting away is a positive coping mechanism.

Counselors will recommend a "code word" and once one person says it, the other person needs to stop talking for 30 minutes. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics