Reply to DH married me to stand up to his mom

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He had a controlling mother. So he got a controlling wife. Maybe he is finally seeking his independence. [/quote]

OP.

Yes, this.  That's what I think too.  He says it's not true but I am the one who can control his mother so it must be true.

And I'm even the one who demanded that we go to counseling.

I'm okay with his mom seeing the kids every visit.  She is very conservative.  More like a woman who won't allow piercings or shaved heads or dyed hair.  She won't even allow salt, butter, or sweets in her house.  The only dessert that she allowed my husband to eat growing up was fresh fruit.  She will demand that he shaves his face everyday and tuck in his shirts and insist that he cannot sleep in -- even on the weekends.  She is a huge traveler with money so she'll be able to take the kids on exotic vacations but then that will be around our visitation schedule.

[b]Here's the issue:. Can we convert the basement into a separate residence so he can live there during the separation and divorce?  We can make a rule of no grandparents at the house, although I don't know how it'll be enforced.

Otherwise, to afford the house, we'll need to rent out the basement to a stranger and we'll miss out on the kids half the time.  Am I being unrealistic?[/b][/quote]
Yes you’re being unrealistic. Divorce is expensive, messy and sucks. But you have to do it. Rent the basement out to a student. Husband leaves. Better to have kids half the time with functionality then full time with dysfunctionality. Make an appointment with a mediator ASAP. [/quote]

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