Reply to If your late 20s/early 30s child told you they were getting divorced, what would your reaction be?

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Reply to "If your late 20s/early 30s child told you they were getting divorced, what would your reaction be?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'd be in a listening mode until my child finished all that they had planned to say given that they certainly would have come prepared. If I had had previous concerns about the spouse I wouldn't say I told you so but[b] I would focus on what to do next [/b]especially if there were children involved. If I really liked the spouse and it wasn't a fidelity issue[b] I would suggest steps to work through the issues - counseling....whatever. I would do my best to be a calming influence and an advisor[/b] and avoid dictating here is what you need to do. The child in an adult and needs to make his/her own decisions.[/quote]

Stop.  Do not tell your adult children "what to do next".  When my husband calls his mom he can barely stand to speak to her because she ALWAYS has advice, tells him what to do, how to handle situations.  It is hurting their relationship, even though he stops her immediately and tells her he isn't looking for advice.

If you adult child doesn't ask for your input, don't volunteer it.  Let them work out the situation on their own. [/quote]

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