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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The OP said the step dad told the child that the child himself was the problem when the kid asked what was wrong.

So that's like my husband losing it and throwing things, my son asking me what's wrong, and me telling my son, "YOU are what's wrong."

I would be concerned on all fronts, OP.  Shoving a kid away from a parent who's having an episode could be acceptable, assuming it's a protective shove and not one with malice.  But the comment that the child is the problem is very concerning.[/quote]

THIS, OP.

Many earlier posters did not catch, or ignored, the fact that the stepdad told the son that son "was the problem" and those PPs depict the stepdad as just protecting the son. OP, you also came back and noted that your son and stepdad have some "history" between them before this--do you mean they've had conflicts before? Have those included any physical contact?

The post above nails it. The whole scenario for both mom and stepdad is concerning. Your son is old enough that a judge should be listening to his input if son wants a change to visitation or custody. Maybe son would prefer to see mom only in a "third place" that is not her home, if possible; I would be leery of letting a kid stay in the household if mom has unpredictable outbursts like you describe. Of course she and her husband can deny she has mental health issues, deny any outburst ever happened, and say son is lying. I'd talk to an attorney who has experience is working with custody and visitation issues.[/quote]

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