Reply to ONS had a child - How screwed am I?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think everyone is being a bit harsh to OP. He's clearly in shock. We don't know how long the mother has kept this from him - shouldn't some responsibility fall on her too? From this account it seems like she wants him just to be a source of income since she couldn't do him the courtesy of notifying him sooner (you know, maybe during the 9 months she was pregnant). Can't have it both ways. [/quote]

He's already been through the court case and caught up on child support arrears.  This isn't new information for him.  He's not in shock, he just doesn't care.[/quote]

OP here.  I've known for a few months so it's somewhat recent.  The child support case went fairly quickly because it's really just a DNA test and then looking at paystubs.  I paid off the arrears in a lump sum because if you're over like $2,500 (less than two months of the amount) they can cancel your passport.

I'm not sure if I would call it shock but I'm mulling what I want to do and what things I should be considering which is why I posted.[/quote]

I think you should work with her and if she says no, sue for visitation.  you want to be in contact with your child.  Who knows what this unknown, possibly mal-intentioned person is telling your poor kid about his or her father, or even how the child is treated.  You owe it to this child, who did nothing wrong, to do your best to give him or her a good life.[/quote]

YES.

And she could turn out to be decent person too, in the end. So stay as calm and courteous as you are right now :-)
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