Reply to Struggling enormously as a SAHM to a SN toddler

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[quote=Anonymous]OP,

I'm glad your kid is making good progress.  I'm sorry for the stress of your marriage.  In addition to getting an anti-depressant for yourself, I agree with others that it's a good idea.

In terms of stopping services, I would not.  Your kid's made good progress, but it's easy to backslide.  As long as you're offered services, take them.  They don't offer them to kids who don't need them.

It's unclear if you have insurance, but if you do, I would consider getting a global evaluation by a developmental pediatrician at some point in the near future.  Early interventions don't diagnose, and although you may not get a firm diagnosis from such an evaluation, I found an evaluation extremely valuable.  It gave a good information of what to look for in future.

Lastly, I would read the Kazdin Method.  You can probably find it at your local library.  It basically helps you learn how to use positive reinforcement to shape behavior change.  So for raising a strong willed child, it will teach you a lot.

If you suspect your husband has a problem with alcohol, I would go to an al-anon meeting.  These are for the family and friends of alcoholics.   You can't control his behavior, he needs to decide to make a change, however, you'll find support.  Often times, people self medicate with alcohol when they are depressed.  So try not to judge your husband.  Alcoholism and depression are diseases.  People don't want to be depressed alcoholics.

For you, in addition to meds, try to take care of yourself the best you can.  I hope you find a social network where you live.  Having a SN child can be isolating.  Try to find parents who's kids also might be on the fringes.   You can only do so much, so if you need to put the job search on the back burner, that's okay.  Stay strong, and happy mother's day tomorrow.[/quote]

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