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[quote=Anonymous][quote=pbraverman]With respect to the PP, this would not be my approach. It is a restatement of the idea that a particular school is more important to a child's success than the child herself.

I'd encourage you to ask first whether you think your daughter should switch schools after sixth grade. If the answer is no, trust your parenting and return in eighth grade to the question of which schools could be good fits. To make a decision now about where she might be in two years is folly; she will change a lot in that time and you are just as likely to be wrong as to be right. (The girl I wrote about earlier, and her parents, did indeed change their minds between grade 6 and grade 8.) At the same time you'll have foreclosed the chance for your daughter to be involved meaningfully in the decision at the very point she is most likely to grow from it.

The use of "you" in the previous post also leaves me uncomfortable — as in, "you" should know that "you" want Holton (I mean, unless you're actually the one applying, in which case we should have a different discussion. :)) It suggests the YOUR goal of getting your daughter into the One Perfect School is more important than raising a self-reliant, confident daughter who can succeed in any environment. ("You're successful and happy now! Mommy wants you to switch!") What windmill are we chasing here?

If you have faith in your daughter, you know she will be awesome no matter where she goes to high school. If you don't, no school will help her overcome the lifetime avalanche of anxiety rolled up in the seductive veneer of "high achievement." (And yeah, I know we're all going to leave our children with clinical-level anxiety. Let's not get sidetracked here!)

Finally, I am surprised that the PP "suspects" that each admission level is "progressively harder than the next." I do not know whether that is the case for Holton specifically, but my experience with most schools does not support that assertion.

That said, I agree completely the admission team is terrific.

Peter[/quote]

OP here, you are absolutely right Peter and its true, I have faith in my daugther and I know she will succeed academically in any school, at this point her feelings and wellbeing are more important. I like the idea that she will be making those decisions when she is in eight grade, with our guidance of course, but she will be part of it. Whereas if we do it next year she will be clueless about what she wants and upset becasue we will be forcing her out of a school she loves and feels part of it. Thanks so much for your good advice.

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