Reply to Well I think its safe to say my DIL hates us

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[quote=Anonymous]So let's see: 
* OP encouraged her son to get a JD in an era where if I had a teenage daughter whose boyfriend were in law school (or wanted to go to law school), I'd tell her "YOU'LL NEVER EAT!" (same as was once told by aspiring actors/actresses.) 
* I won't join in the chorus of "ZOMG he had a kid at 24!!!one!!!" Guy had a job, a wife, and was perfectly fine to have a kid at that age. 
* Son, on the basis of advice from OP (who probably thinks all lawyers make bank because well they did 30 years ago), and on the basis of phantom promises from his job (none of which have ever been put into writing), agrees. 
* DIL decided on her own during the middle of law school (and having a harder go of it) to (1) have a second kid and (2) ZOMG this is so hard I must stay home now. 
* To be fair, this may have been a decision made by DIL acting petualantly in the hopes of either her husband quitting law school or deciding to let her stay at home. Now if DIL is fine with living in a TH, the Kennedy HS zone, or in Frederick, and can make the sacrifices accordingly, more power to her. But it does seem a huge percentage of the women who unilaterally decide to stay at home seem to want everything they had pre-SAH, but they get to SAH. Or they want so much wining and dining because it's SO HARD that DH has to work two jobs to keep up with all the need for vacations and date nights. 
* To be even more fair, DIL may have objected strenuously before her husband went to law school or expressed objections early on in the law school experience when it wouldn't be 50k down the drain to quit, all of which were just ignored. She may have also announced "hey, I'd like a second kid and to stay at home" but was ignored then too. Or, she might've inwardly seethed but not wanted to be seen as "going against her husband's DREAMZ" and so said yes but the moment anything went the least bit wrong, started complaining. I will say young women see especially prone to this sort of behavior and it really doesn't do anyone any favors. Damn wider culture. 
* After a few pages of earnest advice, OP declares, "Oh, but we're from a different culture!" and thus invalidates everything said up to that point. We're in America now. Your DIL can run over to the courthouse tomorrow and file for divorce. Honor killings aren't allowed here (to be fair, those are seen even in Pakistan as the sort of thing their version of inbred West Virginia hillbillies do, but are sort of tolerated the way most Whites -- including myself -- tolerate the ignorance coming from inbred West Virginia hillbillies. But never fear, non-Whites tolerate their own dumbasses in much the same way, so it's all even, I guess.) But, said culture is unknown, so we don't know whether to give advice germane to South Asians, South Americans, or South Africans. [/quote]

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