Reply to Appropriate punishment if you catch teen texting & driving & speeding?

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Reply to "Appropriate punishment if you catch teen texting & driving & speeding?"

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[quote=Anonymous]If I had the situation as described in the OP, I would sit my kid down and tell them what I found. They would have one chance to either come clean that they were speeding that badly & texting or explain what was going on if they claimed they weren't. If they had done those things behind the wheel, they would have no driving privileges for 3 months minimum and be required to watch videos, do research & write essays about the consequences of reckless driving before regaining *supervised* driving privileges with an adult family member in the front seat with them for at least another month. If all that was completed to my satisfaction, they could have their driving privileges back. In the meantime, they would either pay for uber rides, take public transit, or wait for rides at my convenience to get anywhere they wanted to go other than work and school.

If my kid claimed that it was a joke, or a misrepresentation of the facts, or otherwise gave me their word that they were NOT driving dangerously, I would tell them that because our family values integrity so highly I would believe them (in our family lying is a betrayal of family trust and the one thing that has worse consequences than anything else), HOWEVER due to the seriousness of the situation their driving and phone use would be closely monitored for an unspecified period of time to give them the chance to demonstrate that they respect basic road safety. Then I would immediately look into, obtain, install, and activate a means of tracking the car's speed. I would also check their phone and if it was used to send any texts at times when the car was in operation & no siblings were in the car who could have been texting for the driver (we do that sometimes), that would be instant loss of phone and car for minimum 6 months plus consequences listed above. Same if car tracker revealed speeding more than 9 mph over the speed limit. The harsher punishment would be because the kid was already on notice to watch it and because I would suspect that the denial of the original incident had been a lie if they showed a pattern of irresponsible driving.

Yes, it's harsh, and yes, it would be inconvenient for both of us, but driving is a huge responsibility and dangerous, so if my teens can't do so responsibly they will not be allowed to do so at all if I have anything to say about it which I do while they're minors, driving our cars, or on our insurance.[/quote]

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