Reply to If DH is a law firm partner, must I be the default parent?

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Reply to "If DH is a law firm partner, must I be the default parent?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't know.  There is a mom in my son's class who is a law firm partner and she is the only one I have ever seen at drop off or pick up or at any type of school function.  It's like the dad doesn't exist.  So seems like she's the default parent.

What a shock - it probably depends whether law firm partner is the husband or the wife.[/quote]

I wonder if that is me you see.  I am default 3/4 of the year because DH is a teacher.   It is not all that good for my career.  The good news is that I have my own clients, and therefore can set my own schedule, more or less.  Makes it hard, though.  [/quote]

You realize that you are the default parent not because DH is a teacher, but because you are a woman, right? I am also a teacher and the default parent--as is 95% of the other female-mother teachers I work with, including those whose husbands are in BigLaw. Division of parenting responsibilities--even beyond the breast-feeding stage--is still remarkably sexist.[/quote]

Because there is no reason for the parent who gets summers and school holidays off to be the default parent other than sexism?  Come on.[/quote]

Did you read the previous PP? This woman is a law firm partner, her DH is a teacher, and SHE is the one who is the default parent.

It makes sense for many reasons for teachers to be the default parent--which is one reason why so many women are attracted to teaching as a career--but it really only serves to reinforce the idea that parenting responsibilities remain largely divided along gender lines.[/quote]

I don't think that was her point.  I think she was saying she was the default parent as far as school events, drop off and pick up, because her DH as a teacher does not have the flexibility to do these things. As a teacher, you must be at work at a certain time and it is very difficult to leave during the school day.  I am a teacher and  I never do drop off for my kids because I am already teaching 90 minutes before they are in school.  My husband (not a lawyer, but still busy at his own job) does all the drop offs and many of the field trips/parties because it is easier for him to run out for a couple of hours during the day.  [/quote]

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