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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think he’s a brat - that’s an easy throwaway comment. Rather, he’s likely seeing a variety of economic situations for the first time and I’d focus on that. We’ve had to deal with this in a different situation and we empathized on the “others have more” by sharing that it’s the same with our own friends and co-workers - that we have people in our own circle who have much more money than we do and how it feels and how we deal with it (can’t join them for expensive outings, etc, still maintain friendships, how to act when you have more). It’s life

I approach the spendy full ride situation in the same way - talk about your own situation such as how taxes work, how much we pay, that some pay nothing but sometimes have nice things like even nicer cars sometimes (tho that’s maybe not the full picture obviously) - this is real life. Sometimes it seems very unfair and sometimes it really is unfair but that is life.  I would focus on the realities of life by sharing what seems unfair in your own life and make it a teaching moment. [/quote]

+1000

This is the right advice, for sure.

Recognize that this is part of his education, too - the complexity of wealth in this country, the outsided cost of college, and of course, how we as a society address inequality in ways that are often inadequate and sometimes unfair.

It sounds like he’s also starting to think about the uncertainty/risk that comes with big investments. It’s hitting him that HE will be paying $80K+ for his college education via loans, and he doesn’t know  if it’s “worth it.”

Kids these days often see “loans” as outsided anchors around their necks - burdens that will prevent them from having a normal, adult life. Help him understand this is not true.

Finally, everyone should keep in mind that you’re on the same team. You all want what’s best for him, and you’re all trying to make the best choices possible.

Yes, there will be big feelings involved. There often are when it comes to money! So it’s good to talk about them - even the hard ones like anger, fear, guilt, resentment, regret. But ultimately, you all are each other’s best resources and will have each other’s backs at every stage.

Finally, he might want to take a related public policy course at college - something about income inequality or the wealth gap or the hollowing out of the middle class etc. He’s living something very real - it might help him to put it into a larger context. [/quote]

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