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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We are picking up 3 cases of beer for my DS. But I guess I’m in the minority of parents. I was also the one who signed on the beach week house and have hosted small gatherings at my house. Guess what, my kid also trusts me to tell me stuff. Sure it’s unorthodox but I’d rather my DS have the trust to tell me if he’s in trouble or needs advice than not. And FWIW, I bought him condoms and plan B too. (Saves him the $50). [/quote]

Did you discuss what you would serve at your "small gatherings " with the parents of the underage kids, before serving them alcohol in your house?

You do know that there are studies that demonstrate that permissive parenting like what you do leads to negative outcomes, don't you?[/quote]

What I've learned is to not take a single day for granted. I have full trust in my kids to be kind and respectful. I have an older kid in college who calls and texts me all the time. What negative outcomes could possibly occur? [/quote]

Have you ever considered what negative outcomes could occur from providing alcohol to your underage kids and their friends?

Or did you stop doing research after figuring out which car seat was the best?

Here you go:

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6521692/

" ... Varvil-Weld and colleagues (2012), using longitudinal methods, observed that [b]students whose parents were pro-alcohol (permissive) were four times more likely to experience problematic consequences compared to students whose parents were anti-alcohol. [/b]Rulison and colleagues (2016) examined whether parental permissiveness of drinking was directly related with alcohol use and consequences or mediated through perceived peer approval of risky drinking. The study found perceived friend approval of drinking mediated some outcomes such as alcohol use and health-based consequences; however, [b]perceived parental permissiveness of drinking was directly related with other consequences including academic problems and driving after drinking. Finally, Calhoun et al. (2018) utilized a four-year within- and between-person longitudinal design and found that college students’ perceptions of their parents’ permissibility toward drinking increased across college. Interestingly, perceived permissibility remained associated with risky drinking behavior even as students approached the legal drinking age.[/b]

See also

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2716564/

"Results indicate that parental permissibility of alcohol use is a consistent predictor of teen drinking behaviors, which was strongly associated with experienced negative consequences.  ...

Overall, results indicated that a parents’ permissive attitude toward alcohol use in late high school was a significant risk factor for teen alcohol misuse and associated consequences in college. Specifically, it appears that the limits parents set for their teens with regard to alcohol consumption are particularly important. Parents in this study who permitted relatively high levels of teen drinking in high school were more likely to have children who engaged in much riskier drinking behaviors than children whose parents permitted relatively low levels of teen drinking. This result appears to be fairly robust, as it was found even after accounting for the effects of gender and all other measured parenting characteristics. It is important to note that limit setting was shown to be important for both male and female college students. Further, the results of additional analyses on limit setting unequivocally showed that complete disapproval was more protective than approving of alcohol consumption at any level, as students with more permissive parents drank significantly more and experienced significantly more negative consequences associated with alcohol consumption.

In reference to recent pieces in the NY Times and Time Magazine (Asimov, 2008; Cloud, 2008), supporting parental endorsement of alcohol use in the home, findings from the current study do not support the notion that parental permissibility of alcohol use (even in small supervised amounts) is likely to reduce later (college) misuse. Proponents of the media created “European Drinking Model” believe that, by allowing their adolescents to drink in controlled environments, their teens will experience fewer negative consequences as the result of use during college. This approach is believed to remove the mystique of the forbidden fruit (alcohol use), thereby erasing the likelihood of misuse once exposed and away from parents. The current study found that parent permissibility was associated with higher drinking rates and experienced consequences for college teens than a strict policy of no underage use."[/quote]

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