Reply to Husband stopping at random dive bars for one beer?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is a 3rd place? I think I missed all that
[/quote]

Not your home, not your office, but somewhere you frequent.

The British and Irish have pubs, Germans Bierhalls, Dutch have cafes, French, Spanish, Italians, Greeks have bistros, tavernas, etc.

Americans have church. [/quote]
Fewer and fewer Americans have church. But I think part of the point of a third place is that it brings you into contact with people outside your ordinary realm, anyway.

The suspicion and control evident in some of the posts here go a long way toward explaining why so many marriages struggle and why so many Americans have trouble connecting with anyone outside their own little bubbles. I bet a lot of you track your partners’ movements through their phones, too. What a way to live.[/quote]

My wife and I totally track each other, I am the PP about the third place that you quoted. I completely agree - some of these posters are unhinged.

We don’t track each other out of suspicion though, we do it for logistics, convenience, and safety.  I travel a decent amount for work and clearly could cheat if I wanted to (i dont have any interest).  I also have pretty good tradecraft and can trick my surveillance if I need to (I put my tracked phone in my parents car as they ran errands around the holidays and I went Christmas shopping and had my work phone with me).

My wife and I trust each other 100% - and the trust provides us both with a lot less stress and a lot more freedom.

I do things like getting a beer by myself somewhat frequently.  I also *gasp* go to dinner/lunch/bars with female colleagues from time to time.  She does the same with male colleagues.

I’ll be honest though, the thing I was most afraid of getting caught doing was sneaking a fancy ice cream sandwich one day without buying her one.  I wasn’t going to see her for an hour or more and I did it on an impulse running errands.  We both eat very healthy and she would be pissed if she found out I didn’t share the indiscretion with her.  That’s about as unfaithful as we get.  It did give me such a rush though.  Maybe it was the sugar?[/quote]

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