Reply to Why do people think you have to spend so much on your kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We have 2 kids, we live in a 3 br townhouse in an exurb that has a 1400/mo mortgage, we send them to public school and we only save $2000 per year per kid for their college while having a 400k HHI. Rec soccer, cheap city summer camps. I don’t believe that you are morally obligated to financially strain yourself just to give your kids what society thinks is the ideal life. Our kids are very happy and don’t feel like they’re deprived from what I can tell. [/quote]
OP, I wouldn’t do the same but I fully understand what you are doing. You are doing the right thing. Good parenting doesn’t mean throwing money into expensive activities for your kids. Money doesn’t buy happiness. Your kids can be happy and have a wonderful life without all of this, and it seems like they are happy. 
Kids don’t need to go to elite colleges to succeed in life. Your plans don’t include paying for expensive colleges and this is totally fine. 
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Huge difference between "paying $80K/year for elite colleges vs fully funding $40-50K/year for good state school/private school with some merit vs go to CC and figure it out from there you are on your own"

Providing an education is very different than funding expensive sports/activities. 
Why have kids is you don't want to help with the basics?  In 2023, helping fund college is part of the basics when you make$400K [/quote]

Exactly- where is all that money going?  To enable OP to retire before their kids are even college-aged?

We save about that much for each of our 2 kids annually at half OP's HHI.  Sure I expect them to contribute with part-time and summer jobs but I had a lot of loans (parents had zero saved) and I don't want that for my kids.  I also don't think it's a good idea to expect them to work fulltime while attending, my sister did that and couldn't devote the time to her classes and her grades suffered.[/quote]

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