Reply to s/o - Aborting because a child is "disabled"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To the PP, are you in DC?  If so, find out if your kids can qualify for Katie Beckett Health Care Waiver.  
Big hugs, from another Mom with almost your exact same life. xxoo[/quote]

Thanks but we're in NOVA.  It's really frustrating when people say that having an SN child as bad as you think and there are resources out there to assist.  There aren't.  Those people are all about pregnancy and not about day-to-day life.  The two organizations posters provided links to ( http://jillshouse.org/ and http://www.hopeinnova.org/ ) don't provide the kind of support I posted about needing.  HOPE in Nova is all about 'crisis pregnancy' and Jill's House only accepts kids starting at age 6 and there's still a cost to the parents - and I also have one 'normal' child.  It would be nice to be able to give her more time and to have money for her to do classes like ballet.  I forgot to include the cost of relationship counseling for DH and I.  Having SN kids has really put a strain on our relationship.  I should just walk away from this thread.[/quote]

No one should think or assume that having a child with special needs is easy. And it's true you have more on your plate than people with only typically developing kids (although those take lots of time and money too, and can put a strain on marriage). But what is the counter argument here? Kids with disabilities don't deserve to be born because they may take more work? No one should talk about the positive aspects of children with disabilities because there are negatives too? Do you wish you had aborted your SN child? I mean maybe you do, and maybe in the context of your situation that makes sense. But it isn't obvious to me that because a person will take more work to raise, or care for, that they don't deserve to be alive. And if, even as a liberal, a person stands up for the rights of disabled kids, many people will say...that child shouldn't even be here, the parents should have aborted him. And also if you argue for the rights of kids with disabilities like Down syndrome to exist, or even just that the obvious solution to the diagnosis doesn't have to be termination, then you are called anti-choice, which I'm not. Abort a kid with Down syndrome, you have that right. But that doesn't mean I have to think it's always the best choice, [b]and that doesn't mean it might not make it harder for kids with special needs who are already born.[/b]
I'm sorry you are struggling.[/quote]

I don't think people should take that into consideration when making the decision to have a disabled child or abort. [/quote]

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