Reply to I know this is completely unethical

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I cannot believe the number of people supporting this plan. OP describes an abusive, controlling man with a lot of money who wants this kid. Does anyone really think she could pull this off without consequences?

OP, eventually this man will find out. When he does, it won't be a matter of sharing custody. It won't matter where he lives. You will lose custody. He will go to court and accuse you of lying and essentially kidnapping his child. And a judge will give him custody and you will be flying back here a handful of times a year for supervised visitation, which is all you will get. Just imagine how you will feel if after 2, 4, 7, or 10 years that child is taken away from you.

You would be insane to consider this. Insane. And that's not even considering the ethical problems.

You have two realistic options:
1. Abort and go about your life. Try a sperm donor if you want a baby now.
2. Go home for a vacation. Call you BF, break up with him, and tell him you're staying where you are. You will either work out a cross-country visitation schedule or he'll sue for custody (he'll have to sue where you have moved) and you'll have to fight in court. He may win, he may not.

That's it. They may be two imperfect choices, but you need to choose the most palatable and follow through. Trying to hide the baby is a truly awful, terrible idea that will bring you a great deal of pain.

Best of luck to you.
[/quote]

I find it really difficult believe a judge would do this with a best interest of the child standard and particularly if the mother had documented ohysical abuse.  The most likely outcome is visits for dad, gradually building up to allowing the father to take the child out of state for more extended period.  No judge is going to send a child out of state with a man the child has never met before, unless the mom is in jail or incapacitated.   It’s not a “which parent acted worse” standard— it’s the best interest of the child.[/quote]

Oh, you sweet summer child. You really have no idea what you’re talking about. Stop.[/quote]

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