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[quote=Anonymous]OP, does your husband's condition limit his ability to care for the children and house at all? Is that why he's not stepping up?

Because he's not being asked to do anything any other stay-at-home parent would do. Plenty of people cook dinner with two children (or more!) underfoot, and manage to wipe down a bathroom and run the vacuum when there's only one child in the house. Nobody says it's easy or fun, or that the results are perfect, but millions of people all over the world manage it just fine. Unless you're expecting a four-course meal and a white-glove spotless house, you're not being unreasonable to ask him to step up.

But many men won't admit to chronic pain, which can also lead to depression or medication overuse, so you might need to ask him to be really upfront with you about how it's affecting him. Is he honestly just slacking, or is he in constant pain from carrying the baby around or something? Without knowing what his condition is, it's hard to say, but it's something to discuss in a non-accusatory way.[/quote]

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