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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom's friend did the DNA test too and found a long lost half sibling she never knew about. They were able to piece together the crazy events involving their shared father. He was married, wife #1 didn't want kids, so they divorced. Right before they divorced she got pregnant. She didn't tell him, and gave the girl up for adoption. Then he married wife #2, mother of my moms friend. The kids all got together last year (parents are all dead).

So yeah, if you get a test done be prepared for uncovering a lot of skeletons.[/quote]

Yes, so true.  There are first cousins cropping up, it's amazing.  A lot of interesting stories.  There's a movement to assure that warnings are posted about possible outcomes of DNA tests.  I will say, I was quite surprised and sad to find out.  It's been 1 1/2 years since I've known that the father I've always known is not my birth father.  I've come to the point of accepting it and realizing that he is still my very wonderful Daddy that raised and loved me. Sperm donor or not, he would not have changed a thing even if he knew.

This year, after my birthday, the first one without my father alive, I went down to my step mom's home as it was around Father's day.  She read me a wonderful blog of somoeone that she knows.  It's called, "A Real Father" by Derek Westra.  Google it and read it, it is beautiful.  She told me that my dad loved me so very much and that he was always so proud of me, not only that, that if he had even known of the DNA fact, it would not have changed his love.  Love is not an emotion, it is a choice and an action.  True love is not something that one can just turn off like a switch.  It is enduring.  It is a love that says, I'm hiding the switch, even better, I'm burying it.  Through thick and thin, kid.  As a side note, dad had given me a $100 gift card that he had won before he passed to uwajimaya.  I used it on my birthday as it felt like a gift from my daddy for my birthday.  My daughter helped me pick out a very nice matcha tea set and some new matcha.  I will pass this on to her when she is on her own as a legacy of love and kindness.  Love is a choice.

You know, my step mom and my dad got married when I was very young.  I love my mom, the one who raised me, don't get me wrong.  I love her very much.  My step mom was very good to my dad and was very kind to us kids.  They never had kids as my dad already had 5.  So we were her kids. We were over there every Sunday.  We each took turns staying the weekend at dad's house.  She made birthdays and holidays special.   They both encouraged me to go to college and helped me to do so as a divorced mom.  I owe my wonderful career to them.  So in the same way as my dad that I've always known is still my dad, my step mum is just as much a mother to me as my mother that gave birth to me and raised me.  See, it's not all about dna, but about stepping up.  I was lucky enough to have 2 moms in my life and a loving dad that raised me. I can't really romanticize the birth father that I did not know, but I am grateful for my life and for the 4 brothers that I have newly found.  This August, we will return to see the brothers and their families for the reunion.  It will be my 3rd time.  The oldest nephew is coming to stay for a week with us, which we are elated about.  I would call these guys every DAY if I could, but I don't want to overwhelm.  So instead I pray for them and their families.

I pray for peace for you and your families during this fun summer season.

I have loved this journey, painful as much of it has been.  I have loved finding out things about me that now make so much more sense.  [/quote]

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