Reply to Our home is a mess. I am thinking of leaving

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Reply to "Our home is a mess. I am thinking of leaving"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just picture this dad and the kids, kicked back and relaxing after a busy day at work, school, activities, errand running.  Then the Ominous Black Cloud walks through the door threatening to rain all over them......[/quote]

That's what I thought.  
[/quote]

I'm not the OP, but in her defense, there are certain objective things that make it clear that they aren't as busy as they should be at school. Like grades. I simply can't imagine treating my kids to things like manicures (!) when they don't even do their homework every day. If the grades were good and it was just OP's perception of a messy house, then I might be more inclined to lean the other way.[/quote]

+1. If the grades are bad, then something needs to change. Calling OP Ominous Black Cloud is unhelpful and mean. Worse, it undermines her by making her the problem instead of the grades.[/quote]

Op is walking into her house and wanting everything to be magically done already.  When it isn't done already, she gets into a snit and her husband takes the kids out of the house and goes to dinner..probably to give her some space.

Ominous Black Cloud may sound mean but I will about bet you that that is the way her family feels when she walks through the door.  Her husband has been tasked with everything from cleaning the house, to making sure his kids brush their teeth, to buying their clothes, to making sure their snacks aren't "junk".....and when that doesn't all get done to Op's standards, Op gets into a snit.  And all that complaining that she does serves to undermine any authority her husband has over the kids - she pretty much diminishes him down to the level of errant child.

To fix this, Op is going to need to approach her husband as a grown up rather than an unruly subordinate.

[/quote]

Nope. OP wants some of these things to have been started, not necessarily finished. Where did OP say “finish”? Everybody with middle and high school kids knows that waiting until 8pm for dinner and then starting homework and whatever else is too late. If her kids are watching cable and getting manicures at the mall until 8pm, that’s actually a problem.

But hey, go ahead and denigrate the one person who seems concerned about it.[/quote]

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