Reply to What's the first 'dirty' thing you notice in someone else's house?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are the people who are complaining about cluttered houses the same people wondering why people don't reciprocate play dates and other invites?

My partner is much messier than I am. I could live my life cleaning up after him (tried that, horrendous, made me resentful), not cleaning up after him and hoping that he will have an epiphany and start picking things up (also horrible, epiphany never came), or asking for help on certain things and picking my battles, and letting some things go. The third one of what worked best, particularly as we both have very busy work schedules. For a while that nrant we never invited anyone over, because I was ashamed of the clutter. But that wasn't fun. Now we invite people over and, you know what, it's not the end of the world that there's clutter. We have a biweekly cleaner and cover the basics ourselves daily, do it's clean enough, but it's never going to look like a show home.

Anyway, this thread was helpful for thinking about what areas to prioritize, but I do want people to know that I've been able to keep my friends without being perfect; [b]in fact my friendships have probably improved because my friends and I let each other in on our daily lives for a last minute coffee or glass of wine, and not just after the marathon cleaning session. And the more I've been doing that, the more I'm realizing that not everyone else keeps a perfect home either, and that's okay.[/b][/quote]

And I think many people are relieved, because it gives the home a kind of comfy feel.  When you're relaxed and admit, "yeah, it's kind of cluttered" then it ends the weird, kind of hyper competitive vibe that some (new) friendships can sometimes have.

I am in my 20s but I have found that many men I have dated also seem to appreciate it.  I think it shows to them that you're chill, or something.

[/quote]

I dont think a cluttered and dirty home is relaxing. If it were so comfortable then hotels and such would be cluttered and dirty. Personally i dont care if someone elses home is dirty and cluttered. It's just not the way i like to live. It is pretty easy to keep a clean house.  First, you simply picknup after yourself, and second, don't mindlessly shop, if you don't fall into the copious consumption trap, you wont have clutter.[/quote]

If you are the only one living in the house maybe it is that easy. But unless absolute tidiness is everyone's priority (or your sworn mission in life) there is going to be some untidiness.  [/quote]

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