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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This whole conversation is interesting.  My mom is a black women and my dad is of another race--guess that made them pioneers 40+ years ago when they got married. ;)

I commented upthread that I attended an HBCU and that most of AA female college friends are still not married in their late 30s, despite being accomplished, attractive, etc.  I agree with the statistician that there are far more educated and eligible AA women than men.  Not impossible for educated AA women to get married but the numbers makes it a little less likely since most of us seem to want to hold out for AA men.  In contrast, AA men are *not* holding out for AA women-- just being real--and instead will date a range of other races in addition to black women.

I agree that due to cultural differences black woman and white men may not always be a good match-- for example, many of my AA female friends attend church regularly and would describe spirituality as being important in their lives, whereas I don't know many white men in the same age group for whom the same characteristics would apply.   However, I still for one think that more AA women who would like to be married one day should at least be *open* to  The idea of interracial dating, if only to increase their chances of finding a good match even if they still ultimately end up with a black man.  My two cents.

FWIW,  I'm married to an African guy, and of my few married AA female friends, they are married to mostly AA men but also Swedish, Middle Eastern, etc.[/quote]

I'm the PP who posted about dating white men but married AA. I look at it this way:  people have all kinds of preferences about who they will date or mate, but it feels like the preferences of black women are the ones most open to criticism from all sides. Just as with the hairstyle I choose (chemically straightened, with no qualms) I'm not making any kind of statement, just exercising my choice. But there's always criticism from some quarter, which people feel free to discuss with me in a way that they'd never bring up with a person of another race or gender.

Reading this thread, I find myself a little disgusted in a way I've never been before by what seems to be a notion that black women [i]should[/i] be willing to date and marry a white man for no other reason than desperation to be married. My father forbid it (though I never cared much what he said) but for the first time I'm understanding what he must have felt that a white guy would believe himself a catch no matter what his character as a person. Best to be avoided than find out after marriage and kids.

But the bottom line is that I chose what was best for me and I think it's rather uncivilized to open up MY CHOICE for public critique and debate. My husband is an excellent husband and father who respects and understands me better than anyone. He can be annoying but not in any way that overshadows his best qualities. He's pretty damned lucky to have me as well and makes sure that I know he knows it. [/quote]

Thank you. This thread in  this topic is tired and infuriating. You said it in a way I couldn't.  I don't tell people who to date/marry. If my friends want to be in relationships with non black then that i their choice. Don't tell me I'm wrong or racists or that I must be open to xyz for  not wanting to marry someone non black.[/quote]

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