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[quote=Anonymous][quote]It just keeps coming back to inheritance for you. Why do you think you keep bringing it up?

"What will pain me, and what I’m bracing myself for, is the fact that in death, as in life, my father will have made it clear that my sibling and I (and his only grandkids) just didn’t matter enough."[/quote]

It's really, really not about money, it's about the fact that for most of my life and all of my kids lives, he has never once protected us from her hostility or interference.  I know and have known his estate plans for a long time and given the way they have done things, I will have to walk away in order to protect my sanity--he left things so that I would have to be dealing with her for years and I just don't want to experience that.  Nothing is worth that mental anguish! But we will see family pictures and sentimental items tossed out of spite rather than given to us, we will be cut out from any service, and erased from his life.  I saw how she behaved with her own parent's death (it resulted in her never speaking to her sibling again), as well as how she dealt with my uncle's death  (my father's only brother) and caused al rupture with his only nephew for no good reason. A couple years ago after a big health scare for him and seeing all this madness, I asked him to put aside sentimental items from his mother--the only grandmother I ever knew--as well as some things from my childhood to go to my kids (none of significant monetary value, a signed baseball from when he was a kid for my son, a set of sculpted animals from his grandparents, his scientific books to my brother) and yet he has abdicated all decisions to his wife, saying she will make sure the right thing is done, which if you know her is delusional. Unless you've dealt with this situation, you really dont understand. A year ago, I started to come to terms with why I was still trying so hard to have a relationship with him and it was when they deeply hurt my kid (his only grandson) that I started to pull back. We didn't do our annual summer visit last year, and focusing on my own family's well being comes first. But my dad is ill (current in hospital) and I am bracing for what comes.[/quote]

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