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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here again. I am not worried about the financials. I am paying child support and my kids are not lacking anything nor will I neglect them if I have another child. As I said it is not my intention to remarry and have more kids but I really love  my current girlfriend and if she says she wants to marry because she wants a child I would do it. But of course I am worried being a new dad all over again as I am entering my 50s. [/quote]

I think it would be very hard not to neglect them in some way if you have more children.  I mean, in some ways, having a baby is easy.  You can drag them along to stuff your older kids are doing.  
But when your second set of kids is 12 and 14, and your current kids are young adults, you aren’t really going to be able to be around.

Should you give up on marriage and having a second family so that you can be around when your kids sporadically need you?  I don’t know.  But don’t pretend there are no downsides.  [/quote]

Would you honestly same the same about women? There are plenty of women on this forum who remarry and have kids OP's ages and I don't recall people telling them what you are telling OP. [/quote]

Look, if a 46 year-old woman who has been dating a guy for ONE MONTH comes on DCUM and wonders about maybe getting pregnant again closer to 50, I'm pretty sure people would react similarly.

The only positive reactions I've seen on this site to women wondering if they should get pregnant in their 40s have been aimed at women who are already married and who really feel their family isn't complete yet, and who are ready to start trying immediately. Not women who thought they were done and then met a guy who wanted biological kids.

To the OP: As for the "will you be a better dad?" questions, you might be for the earliest years, because you are more financially and emotionally stable presumably. But you also weren't a kid when your first set of kids were born so it might not be that much of an improvement. You need to think about the long hard slog that is parenting, though. Yes, you'd be in your early 50s for the infant/toddler years, but parenting doesn't stop after those years. Do you really want to be getting up at 4 am for swim practice in your 60s? Or giving up your entire weekend for baseball tournaments? Or driving carpool after closing curtain every night during tech week for the fall musical? Or jumping on a plane in your 70s because your young adult child is having a hard time in the dorms?

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