Reply to If you wanted to legally and safely annoy an apartment neighbor,

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If someone doesn’t respect and is hostile to you at some point you need to come out swinging. Not with violence but it’s essential to not quietly take it.

Find a weakness and exploit it,
be vocal and loud. Nothing wrong
with good old fashioned fear of what you might do to put a bully in his or her place.

And I don’t live alone. But I know plenty of women who do. And they are all capable of being loud, cunning and ferocious when they need to be. [/quote]

Who needs to be? A neighbor who may or may not be giving dirty looks is not someone who needs to be interacted with.[/quote]

What about a neighbor who is saying nasty things about you to everyone else in the building/neighborhood? That's the kind of behavior that can negative consequences. Just ignoring it may not be an option if they are destroying your reputation.[/quote]

Meh. Not everyone listens to gossip.

But if OP goes psycho and is found to be responsible for childish pranks, well, she will deserve a negative reputation.[/quote]

Define "goes psycho." Hanging wind chimes? Come on.[/quote]

Purposefully annoying people in secret rather than handling your personal problems like a responsible adult.[/quote]

Ok but about the fact that the neighbor is handling whatever this issue is by badmouthing OP and being rude to her. Is he being a "responsible adult"?

It's always a problem. How do you deal with people who are nasty and underhanded? Everyone will tell you to ignore it and "take the high ground." But in my experience this often just means people get away with treating you badly and you put up with it. Of course if you lower yourself to their level, that doesn't work either.

OP is looking for a third way. Not engaging in the same behavior as they are by badmouthing them, trying to drag neighbors into it, being rude to them. But to passive aggressively make them want to move so that they go away and the conflict ends. I don't think this is a "psycho" impulse. It's actually a reasonable option to explore. I don't know that it will work (I think it would be very hard to annoy someone enough that they decide to move without it tipping over to harassment) but I fully understand why you'd try to come up with some options because I wouldn't want to live next door to someone like that either, and I also would not want to move just to get away from them either.

OP does not sound at all crazy to me. It's a real problem, I hope she finds a way to solve it.[/quote]

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