Reply to Post affair, husband tired of me bringing it up

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm so sorry, OP. I went back and forth deciding to post this because it just happened yesterday and I actually thought of you after because this is what you deserve and the very least your DH can do is be patient and support you through healing from something HE caused.

We are about a year out from dday and yesterday someone at work found out their dh was having an affair and I accidentally heard her crying in the parking garage on the phone with someone and it made me absolutely spiral and get enraged for her but also for me.

I texted my DH what happened and he responded "I am so sorry that happened to her and in front of you. I know I can't fully imagine how triggering that must of been for you, but I am so incredibly sorry that the horrible choices I made affect you in these day to day situations. You did nothing to deserve what I did to you. I was such a coward. I was struggling and should have come to you and communicated what I was feeling, but instead I avoided conflict and ran- emotionally and physically. I was so selfish and treated an amazing person incredibly poorly and will regret it every single day for the rest of my life. I'm here and I'm trying and I want to support you in any capacity that I can. Please feel free to talk to me about this tonight if it's still bothering you. I love you and I'm sorry that your coworker is about to go through this too."

Granted he's reached this point after weekly individual therapy and biweekly marriage therapy for the last 50 weeks, but I hope you can find peace OP.

Some resources for your DH:
-The r/supportforwaywards subreddit
-The book How to Help Your Spouse Heal from Your Affair (it's a very quick read. My DH read it and highlighted areas he felt pertained to him and then I read it with his highlights and notes and it made me understand a lot better).
-The Wayward Side forum on surviving infidelity.com
-This post is a great quick start for him to read. HAVE HIM READ THIS FIRST- it actually affirms to him everyone you are feeling is NORMAL and needed for processing. https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/topics/324250/things-that-every-ws-needs-to-know/

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