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[quote=Anonymous]OP, some posters are saying to dump this guy already, but I don't necessarily think that's the answer.  Half of the answer will depend on your expectations and what you need/want, and the other half will depend on whether he is able to meet you where you want to be.

I posted before that I'm married to someone very like your guy, except more extreme, and I said your guy would be the same for the rest of your future if you choose to stay with him.  My guy took 5 years to come around to marriage, then another 3 years to come around to starting a family.  I was 35 by then.  I'm dissatisfied with our marriage, but it isn't the worst, and I'm glad I'm not dealing with infidelity, addiction, or financial worries. But I'm also very self-sufficient and independent, and have very low expectations in terms of getting my needs met by others because of the way I was raised and growing up with parents with a bad marriage.  And that is probably the only reason we are still together.  I have always been the one in the relationship to lead most things - taking the next step, house hunting, financial planning, social planning, family and friend relations, and everything related to our children.  He's still a good dad who tries to spend time with them, but he is uninvolved with any of the details and planning around them.

So you can take that bit as a foreshadowing of your future if you stay with him.[/quote]

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