Reply to Optimistic that I am going to fix my "default parent" situation

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't understand why anyone would marry someone who isn't willing and abke to pull their weight.  I dumped a few guys for it after the first few months of dating.  Couldn't you see this coming?[/quote]

Because other things in the relationship that were positive were more important at the time?[/quote]

And because pre-marriage and pre-kids, few people if anyone knows what a default parent is, much less what being one entails.[/quote]

But couldn't you tell whether or not he has a basically lazy or irresponsible attitude?  I refused to date anyone whose place was a mess, who couldn't plan time accurately, or who was flaky on committments.  Because it was obvious that he would be even worse after kids.[/quote]

You were smart! But that's not much of a help to those of us in the sadly common plight of the default parent. [/quote]

I really don't know what to say that would help.  If you are willing to draw some red lines and not back down, it may improve.  But a lot of women aren't.[/quote]

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