Reply to Why are parents now expected to help with all their kids' homework?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My K child never had homework last year.

That said, I absolutely had homework as a kid in the DMV from 1st on up. By about mid first grade, your child should be able to read most of the instructions. That said, helping a child with homework is something you need to be prepared for from now[b] until they graduate.[/b] This was always the norm around here, and I never knew anyone whose parents made excuses not to. [/quote]

By about 9th grade the math curriculum will have surpassed my current math capabilities.  I went to RM and took B/C Calc my senior year.  That was some 25 years ago.  I haven't used it since.  No way will I be able to help my HS Senior with that homework.  I also took AP Chem--couldn't calculate a mole today if my life depended on it.   That thermal dynamics I learned in AP physics--nope, can't help you there either.  I could read an english or history essay for substance and grammar though.

My parents did not help me with my homework in HS.  If I didn't understand a concept, it was my responsibility to let the teacher know and schedule time to review the material with them.  If that meant missing lunch, that's what I did or if I had to miss PE to sit through the class lecture again, then I did.  But counting on mom and dad to explain those concepts was not an option.[/quote]

This is interesting, if inadvertent, commentary on the usefulness (or lack thereof) of a lot of what we learned (or rather briefly memorized in many cases) in school.[/quote]

NP. Once my kids are in later elementary school, that is something I directly teach them. Some of what you learn in school will be useful; some of it is only a hoop-jumping exercise that you need to do in order to get other benefits. Good grades don't only measure knowledge and don't always measure knowledge or learning effectively. And yes, some stuff in school is pointless, but good grades are the gateway to many things that will help build a desirable future.

It's up to them to decide what they need to do to get what they want. Some homework can (and in our cost/benefit calculations, should) be ignored but that doesn't exempt anyone from the consequences of not doing it or doing it poorly. There's always a cost that we have to be prepared to pay for every choice about how to use our time. In some cases, doing the homework is NOT worth it; in other cases skipping or hurrying the homework is the choice that would NOT be worth it.

In grades k-2 the kids do all of their homework with as much of my support as is needed, in order to 1) teach study habits, and 2) make sure they have a solid academic foundation. Even if the work itself is pointless, they need to learn that sometimes the world requires pointlessness in order to get useful or desired things. And in early elementary, most of the homework was either beneficial or fun. In 3rd, I start to help them prioritize and very occasionally this would mean an assignment is not done or not done with much effort. In 4th grade and beyond, I had/have nothing to do with homework unless asked as long as all progress report/report card grades are a B or better. With 3 kids older than 4th grade, so far this has meant most homework is at least attempted but some is poor quality or just ignored. In middle and high school, my older three have definitely prioritized some assignments over others based on the utility of the assignment to their learning and/or the impact on their grade.  [/quote]

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