Reply to Shlumpy guy. Should I give hima chance?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would. Those guys are good guys.[/quote]

Agree.  Some men just need some touch up here and there.  But personalities cannot be changed.  [/quote]

+1 [/quote]

I don't think anyone should take on a person as a fixer-upper project. Think of it like buying a house. If you think he needs to be 'gutted' or 'stripped to the studs and then rebuilt' give him a pass. He deserves someone who likes him (mostly) as he is. But you're never going to find your dream house (man) 100% as you imagined him - if all this guy needs is "new paint" as it sounds to me, then it's a worth more dates. [b]You're not trying to change HIM, just some aesthetic stuff about how he presents himself.[/b] [/quote]

The way he presents himself IS a part of his identity. And, as I said earlier, it's not her body, she doesn't get a vote. She can either love him for what he is, or she can move on.[/quote]

I'm the PP you're quoting, and I don't think we actually disagree with each other all that much. How he presents himself MAY be part of his identity, or he may just never have thought about it/known what to do/what would make him look his best, like a lot of men I know.

I think all relationships of any length introduce us to new things. I have no idea if I like Korean food, or wake-boarding because I've never tried either one. But if my partner loved either one, chances are I'd give them a chance too. This guy may not have strong feelings about his current look, and it may be what it is more out of default than it is a deliberate choice. If that's the case, there's nothing wrong with her showing him some new glasses, clothes, etc. He might like them, too. [/quote]

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