Reply to What do you think about letting 17 yr old hang out alone in his room with his girlfriend?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unless you expect you DC to remain a virgin until married, the "what if the condom breaks" issue doesn't go away when they turn 18.  I don't want my DC to get pregnant in college, either.  Given that goal, what is the best way to achieve it?

The MIT jab is hysterical.  DD is at the top of her class and had phenomenal SATs.  I have no doubt about her ability to get into a fantastic college (though she has no interest in MIT, so you are right that your kid will get in there before mine).  Kids who have sex get into all sorts of top schools.  But the college doesn't matter.  If my child were a student with lower grades, I would still not want her to get pregnant.[/quote]

This is where we come back to my original premise that I just don't believe you exist. You propose a seemingly ideal situation in which your brilliant DD maintains stellar grades while keeping her perfect boyfriend sexually satisfied and never ever worrying about pregnancy and/or STDs because they are both so responsible. Let me guess: your DH is perfect, too, right? Where do you get this stuff? Romance novels? Because you really stretch credulity.

Here's my reality: DH and I are lawyers who want our kids to go to MIT and don't want pregnancy and/or STDs to stand in their way, so they can focus on condoms when they're of legal age to buy them on their own. Right now, our kids are in elementary school, so it's not an issue, but when the time comes, bedroom doors will stay open and boyfriends/girlfriends will stay downstairs. Since we generally associate with people of similar backgrounds and ambitions for their own kids, we're sure to find like minded parents when the time comes.

Believe what you want about how you define "maturity" and "committed relationships," but I think you're either fictional or just plain wrong.[/quote]

If they are 17 now, they'll be 18 in what, a few months? LEGAL adults? Then what are you going to do?

Yes, I'd prefer my kids waited until college. But in some ways there's a lot more to juggle in college. Many, many of my friends started college, had sex with new boyfriends or multiple partners -- and they all went on to full lives. Were there any unintended pregnancies? Yes, but almost all of them were in senior year or right after college, which could also torpedo school. (All my friends had abortions and continued their education.)

I also have several sets of friends who were sleeping with their high school boyfriends, married them after college -- and they are still married, 30 plus years later.

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