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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You are expecting too much from your parents. Parents aren't there to help with your kids or pay for your kids. If you get that from even one side, you've won the lotto.[/quote]

+1. You should have discussed your child care plans and jobs they would have before you had kids if they were supposed to be part of the plan. Other than that-some grandparents ARE disengaged and that does suck. You want them to care so much/LIVE for their grandkids like some grandparents do. But not everyone is that way and sometimes that's not health either.

But you can't get blood from a stone, so change your expectations to what falls in line with their actual behaviour.

PS stop feeding your inlaws info/your verbals and/or non-verbals about your parents. They are feeding off that and are now also apparently acting entitled. They should just feel sneakily lucky that they don't have to share the grandkids- UNLESS they too actually want to be off the hook and DON'T actually want to have to be stepping up as much as they apparently have been.

I think you and DH may need to rethink how much you are having others help you out. Possibly assess your overspending if you are having an issue affording paid child care. [/quote]

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