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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]All this makes one try to figure out what the best model may be to ensure our own children aren't burdened with our care.

Just talking out loud, curious on thoughts on:

- Move into a 55+ community that provides soups-to-nuts living arrangements...independent living when still capable, assisted living when the time comes, and nursing care when the time comes.  Thinking that since elderly are resistant to change, it won't feel scary to just move a couple blocks up the street when the time comes, and perhaps these places have a more extensive network of elder care workers if in fact you wanted to stay in your home;

- Pick a community near where at least one of your kids live...or pick a community in a "vacation" type location...either a place that is convenient for kids to visit or they want to visit;

- Maybe not choose a 55+ commmunity...but maybe a community affiliated with an assisted living/nursing kind of facility, so no restrictions on who can live in the independent living area, but again, when the time comes you must move across the street (do these places exist?);

- Seems like once most people hit a certain age, their capability to make decisions freezes...so maybe make a pact to make the move no later than 70?

- Have honest conversations with your kids when say you are 60 and the kids are 30, about your plans for the above?

- Feels like burdening your heirs with real estate is a major pain-in-the-ass...perhaps best to plan to sell your house at some point and then rent?  Or maybe, plan to have your house down to a minimalist kind of situation?

I guess it just seems like our parents are maybe the last generation (or maybe it's the boomers) where you either didn't have a plan, or you didn't include your children in a plan...and now things are mess.

Any other ideas so we don't make the mistakes of our parents?[/quote]

Move into a CCRC when still healthy.  Pay the large upfront entry fee so all "higher level care" is fully covered without a price increase (well okay, the only price increase is paying for 3 full meals a day versus 1-1.5 that's currently included).    
My parents were LMC, frugal and saved as much as they could.  We had to pay the $400K+ entry fee but they qualified for the smallest 2 bedroom/2 bath at a very nice facility.  But now they have spent 5 years in independent living, are more social, no longer have yard work or home maintenance, and we know they are well cared for.  If either needs nursing care/memory care/assisted living, the transition would happen within a day.  The other would be able to visit them by walking inside the complex.  If possible, the healthy one could bring them to the apartment for part of day and meals (sometime possible with even early memory care) but return them so they are safe the rest of the day.

IMO everyone should attempt to enter a CCRC by early 70s.  Also, should they "run out of money" they will never have to pay anymore to the facility and still get to live there.  They facility does not touch SS income.  Currently there are 4 members who have "run out of money" all are women 95+ (spouses have passed already).  2 are still in independent living, the other 2 are in advanced care.  And it's true, you don't pay anything else.  THat's what the high entry fee is for---to cover advanced care and someone living well into their 90s (most people don't and they make more from the entry fee).

[/quote]

Do all these facilities run the same way, or is it really you need to read the fine print of all CCRCs?

What are the main reasons to pay the big up-front fee?  Is it the guarantee of a place at all levels of care?  Is it that they can't kick you out if you don't pay?  Are all activities usually included with your monthly fee in independent living?  Any level of meals usually part of the monthly independent living fee?

I assume there must be some NW test or other kind of vetting they perform, correct?  I doubt they would accept someone who can only pay the up-front fee and a year of independent living as an example.[/quote]

You need to read the fine print and make sure you know what you are purchasing.

For my parents, there were 3 paths: one with a really large upfront fee and you get at least 50% back guaranteed upon death of both, 2nd with a large entry fee ($425K for the smallest 2 bed/2bath my parents selected) with the guaranteed all healthcare/advanced care fully funded and you can never run out of money, 3rd for $300K entry fee, but you pay fee for the services beyond Independent living.

Number 2 is worth it if even one of your parents need advanced care for 1 year or more.  If one requires it, the other can remain in the same 2bedroom (or downgrade for lower monthly fee but it's not worth it or required) for the same rates (with the currently monthly price).  If they go to memory care, assisted living or nursing care, all they pay additional is for the extra meals for that person (or both if they both go) .  Most facilities are 10-14K/month for that, hence my ~1Year break even point.  
If my parents run out of money (they might around 90), they don't owe anything and get to keep living there the same way.  This only includes their investments---not SS monthly.  So they can still afford to pay for medicare, medical bills and medications and other basic living expenses (groceries, toiletries, cable, mobile phone, etc).  Seems like a good deal to me.  We are 3K miles away, parents want to stay in area they have lived for 45+ years.  I want them to be well cared for and not have to worry about finding the next level care when one takes a fall or has medical issue.  I like that they will always be in the same facility, so they can visit each other daily once one is not in independent living---IMO elderly start to decline rapidly when they cannot see their immediate family (as in spouse or whomever they are used to seeing daily/weekly/etc).    Also I know for a fact that this financial stuff is all true--there are currently 4 residents who dont pay monthly anymore.  Only a few make it to that---the actuarial process of calculating the entry fees obviously is setup for the CCRC to make money on most residents.  But for peace of mind it's worth it.

Independent living monthly fees include all utilities(Ac and heat), all maintenance, all appliances (and maintenance), bi-weekly house cleaning, internet, cable tv, fitness center and swimming pool (indoor) along with tons of classes and activities, on campus shuttle service, shuttles to doctors for minimal fees (parents had to use it finally a few months ago---4 hours door to door was $31.26--they wait for you at your appts), and a dollar amount for dining each month and so much more.  They have outdoor walking areas in nature, farm to table concept and the local garden to support it. Residents can help with it or have their own gardens.  
They also have doctor/dentist/hairdresser/etc on site.  Not included in your fees, but was very nice during covid to not have to venture out beyond the property.  
The dining works out to one dinner daily at the buffet restaurant per person and enough left for probably 2-3 other meals each week (breakfast or lunch).  They also have a fancier sit down restaurant and that is a bit pricier.  There are also people who eat 3 meals a day with it---as an egg sandwich with meat and coffee is $3 from the Counter bar.  And if you eat salad bar and soup bar (unlimited) for lunch or dinner it's cheaper than the full buffet.  So there are a few elderly men (widowers) who manage to eat all 3 meals there daily without having to pay much more.  In reality I think dinner at the buffet is only $9

If you go to care more than IL, you have to pay the cost for 3 meals per day (or rather the added 2 or so).

You have to do a full physical before being admitted.  They are not going to admit someone who appears to not be able to do independent living for 4-5 years at that point.  That is why you need to enter while still healthy.  My parents have been there over 5 years---once we convinced them to sell the house and do this, we jumped on the opportunity before they could change their mind.  They love it and are forever grateful we encouraged this.  [/quote]

Very helpful.  Thank you.

A small point…but are guests allowed to stay in the IL part?  If you have a 2BR, are guests allowed in the spare for a couple days?[/quote]

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