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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My friend who married more of an alpha type is very easy going. She is down to earth, not spoiled, a genuinely nice person and fun to be around. My friends and I are all more spoiled than she is. We’re nice people but she is inherently kinder and probably nicer to her husband.

Honestly, most women I know aren’t married to alphas. They’re married to men who let them call most of the shots.[/quote]

That’s passive, reactive, lazy. To “let” your wife do everything.

Alphas have too much pride in things to do that. They’ll plan a party and tell the wife to show up and enjoy it! They’ll take the kid to batting practice twice a week without being told. They’ll see a little dent in your car and whisk it to the body shop over lunch for you.

What they won’t do is ignore things that need addressing. They are proactive. They can probably even start and hold discussions with you on matters of the house or kids or schedules.

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My husband is “alpha,” and all of this is true.  He also is irritated that I didn’t notice or take care of the dent myself.  And he will expect me to have the house clean and dinner made around his batting practice schedule, whether he remembers to make time to eat with us or not.

The thing is, you have to be very easy going to get along with alpha men.  I’m the kind of person who gets along with almost everyone and who has pretty permeable boundaries.  My husband wants to be in charge and make most of the decisions.  He wants to vacation when and where it’s convenient, and he wants to work the hours he wants to at job the job he wants to do.

At the same time, DH is irritated that I’m so easy going.  I legitimately don’t care about the dent in the car or whether DS is good at baseball, and the chaos with the house and kids doesn’t stress me out.  I don’t feel a need to keep a “tight ship.”  Also, people I work with  take advantage of me sometimes, an I do get really torn and really stressed between trying to make my boss happy and trying to make DH happy.  This drives him nuts.

I think a lot of people want to have their cake and eat it too.  If you want to have your way most of the time, then you are going to have to deal with someone who is easy going and not assertive about getting their way.

If you want to be with someone who is “alpha,” then you have to deal with not being in charge of things.  
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