Reply to Cry it out is the most heartless and cruel thing you can do to a child…

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Who knows if CIO leads to anxiety etc etc. It’s on a spectrum of “firm but loving” things that have been done to children for generations that we are evolving out of. Thank goodness.

Re: pediatricians. They don’t know any more than the rest of us about the neuroscience of babies. Trust them when your kid gets RSV or has torticollis. Follow their vaccine recs. Emotional health? No way. [/quote]

This is so true on pediatricians. Most of the behavioral/emotional developmental advice you get from pediatricians is based not on specialized knowledge but a combination of AAP recommendations and observation, the latter of which can be very easily biased.

I am not opposed to sleep training but could not personally do it -- I am a weirdo who enjoyed nighttime feeds and I had a lot of leeway with return to work so it was not imperative for me. I remember my pediatrician asking at our 6 mo appointment if DC was STTN yet and when I said no (we were still doing one feeding at night), the doctor got all worked up about it and said we needed to sleep train and that it was "not normal" for the baby to be waking up for food at that age. It felt like she was shaming me for not sleep training and assumed the night wake ups were burdensome (they were not at that stage -- they were short and easy and had become part of my routine enough that it was doable). By 9 months, DC was STTN on his own without training, but the doctor assumed we'd sleep trained without asking and this clearly confirmed for her that she had been "right" in telling us to sleep train. We got similar advice during potty training -- just strict instructions that did not work with how we chose to approach it, and then when our kid was successfully potty trained she credited her advice that we had totally ignored.

She is otherwise a great pediatrician, and I trust her implicitly on medical issues. But for behavioral stuff we consult other sources (actual behavioral experts) and reach our own conclusions.[/quote]

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