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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Parents, if your child’s teacher suggests that there is an issue with your child’s behavior or academic progress, please know that their only agenda is to help your child thrive and grow. Your child’s teacher has probably worked with hundreds of students at the same developmental phase and knows when something is unusual. I understand that it can be painful and scary to hear, but denial does not help your child. The longer you wait to get them help the more they will struggle. This also applies when the teacher tells you your child is not kind to others. The teacher is definitely working to support their social development in the classroom, but your denial makes it nearly impossible for them to progress (after all, their behavior usually communicates what THEY experience at home usually). Your mean kid is not “a leader of the pack” they’re a bully. And your child on the spectrum is not only “a loner genius”, they’re autistic. And your child who is getting picked on is not always “an innocent victim” they usually need to learn how to NOT be a victim. The teacher’s agenda is usually the same as yours-the well-being and growth of your child. But please trust their experience.[/quote]

Then get rid of the bad apples in your profession.  This actually happened to both of my kids:  K and 1st grade teachers say the kid is wonderful.  2nd grade teacher has a long list of the ways she finds the kid deficient.  3rd, 4th, and so on teachers return to viewing the kid as wonderful.  3rd grade teacher was completely perplexed by everything the 2nd grade teacher said about kid.

Same 2nd grade teacher told me that it was my DD's fault that she was being bullied, since the other kids were the most wonderful, perfect girls in the universe, my DD was annoying, they didn't want to socialize with or talk to my DD, and they had no choice but to be mean to help my DD pick up on the social cue that they were out of her league.  Meanness included making fun of DD's clothing, rolling their eyes at her and covering their ears every time she opened her mouth, including while answering the teacher in class, mocking DD's religion (they didn't understand agnosticism, so they decided DD was Jewish and then mocked her for that), refusing to let her sit near them on the bus, and so on.  For my DS, it was simpler.  This was one of those teachers who loved all of the Pretty Princess girls and pretty much hated all boys.

I want to respect teachers, but if your view is the outlier compared to all of the other teachers or professionals who deal with my kid, then I'm going to assume that you're either prejudiced in some way or an idiot.  [/quote]

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