Reply to Why do you blame your DIL/SIL instead of your son/brother?

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Reply to "Why do you blame your DIL/SIL instead of your son/brother?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I see it time and again, and just experienced it this weekend: women who insist on blaming/chiding/cajoling their DILs or SILs instead of the son they raised or the brother they grew up with for failing to keep in touch, not sending gifts, not agreeing to visits or vacation plans, etc., etc.

My MIL and FIL visited this weekend, and MIL was all over me to FaceTime with the kids more. I said, “Why don’t you arrange that with Bill?” She looked at me like I have two heads. I text her kid pics and occasionally text to see how she’s doing or say happy birthday or whatever, but I hate FaceTiming in general, and it’s especially bad with MIL/FIL because they don’t allow anyone else to talk, they shout, and they expect the kids to sit still and “chat” for 20-30 minutes, when small kids have little interest in that. So I leave FaceTime calls with my husband’s family to…my husband.

Then we’ve got the current poster in this forum who is mad at her SIL for perceived lack of interest in a visit when at least the SIL responded to her text, and her own brother didn’t respond at all!

What is with women who expect only other women to carry family duties/emotional labor, when it’s not even their own family of origin?! You want to talk/visit/make plans? Pick up the damn phone and call your son/brother. And if you don’t hear from them much, well, it’s not their wives’ fault that they are just not that into you.[/quote]

Because sometimes the SIL/DIL does prevent the brother/son from seeing his family by putting  her family over his.  And if the wife wants to go to wife's family for X holiday than the husband is going to cave.  How many of you said "happy wife, happy life"?

Honestly, my brother does his best to keep in touch but, we are never going to celebrate holidays together and that is fact.  don't worry we don't bother SIL and she gets to do what she want.[/quote]

That's just it though unless his wife is tying him to a chair one adult cannot "prevent" another adult from who they see. If he really wanted to see his family he would make it a point to despite what his wife says. Everyone has cell phones now a days he can pick up the phone and call them or hop in the car himself and visit them.

What's with all these posters letting the man off the hook when it's their family and they are responsible for their own actions?[/quote]

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