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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You're a really good mother who has tried to make it easy for your child to have a relationship with his son. Hats off to you for going so long with having just a verbal agreement and while $400 is pretty laughable I'm glad he's shown some sense of responsibility by paying child support without having to get legal.

What do you think the driving reasons are for this sudden attempt to get legal? Somehow trying to avoid child support? Do you suspect he plans to move? A sudden realization that he has no real relationship with his son and is trying to do what he thinks he can to make up for lost time? He disagrees with your parenting on some fundamental level and wants a say? With middle and high school on the way he wants a say in where your son goes to school?  Is bored self quarantining and wants a playmate on Sundays? Where is this coming from? [/quote]

He disagrees that our son has ADD (apparently) although he has never actually said this to me.  I read it in the complaint.  I have kept him up to date on all of the testing, therapy, doctor's appt.  He chose not to go to any.  If he ever brought up the idea of doing something different I would have been open to listening.  I want what is best for our son.  [/quote]

New poster. Sorry if this has been addressed but I can't read all of the thread now. Is it possible that the ex is making the "I don't believe son has ADD" the crux of his request? I'd be concerned that ex has developed some kind of anti-diagnosis bias, for lack of a better term, and for some reason has decided to get involved only to try to stymie therapy etc. I know a divorce situation where the father was dead set on believing the son did not have ADHD and fought mom over it constantly. The dad's take was that "my son is normal and perfectly fine and doesn't need useless interventions or meds!" Any chance, OP, that your ex has someone bending his ear lately about ADD not being "real" or something like that? [/quote]

Dad can always take child for a second opinion.  Mom wants more money, [b]Dad wants more visitation[/b] and joint custody.  Its a fair trade off.  Mom's post, if it is real, makes no sense as [b]she is living there so Dad can spend more time with his child so if she is in the same building for that reason then how is this a question.[/b]  Its a non issue.  So the issues are joint custody and child support.  You compromise.  Dad increases child support per the child support calculator or negotiate to lets say $650 a month from $400 and mom gives dad joint.[/quote]

Have you read the thread? Dad doesn't want more visitation.  He had Sundays all along and all he wants is once a week visits on Sunday, nothing else.  Yes, she is living in the same building so he can spend more time with the child (than once a week) but so far he has not done that.  He doesn't want more than 1/7th of the work so why should he have 1/2 of decision rights?[/quote]

She lives in the same building as its the building she wants to live in.  It has nothing to do with Dad.  He is getting 4 days a month.  That is equal to every other weekend.  He is paying child support and it is 50% his child that's why.[/quote]

Wrong on all accounts. I live in this building because of him. When our child was younger there was a hope that the proximity would facilitate a better and more frequent contact. As the years went on it became apparent that us living here meant nothing to my ex but my child was established at his school and I didn’t want to uproot him.  No, a few hours on Sundays is not parenting by any stretch. They play video games and he feeds him McDonalds every weekend. Tells DS he has no money for anything better. Ex is actually a fenomenal cook but can’t be bothered to prepare a single meal for his child.  I on the other hand, cook all of our meals, do drop off and pick up at school (another reason I live where I live). I am responsible for all of the homework which is not easy for a child with ADD. I take him to all of the drs and therapy appts, I do all of the school meetings. I do this for my child of course, but please cut the s”it about how a few hours of mine craft and movies is deserving of 50% legal custody. He doesn’t know his own son. How is he going to make decisions?

Furthermore, he cries to our son how he doesn’t have money for anything but McDonald’s but he has thousands to spend on a lawyer. [/quote]

He is feeding the child so where is the issue.  It sounds like you only will allow them to spend time together IF he does it your way by your rules.  If he wants to spend his time playing video games and McDonalds that is ok.  That is not abuse or neglect.  It may nt be the best parenting but [b]the important thing is they are spending time together.[/b][/quote]

Right, whatever crumbs he offers should be graciously accepted by me and DS.  Obviously I have no control over what they do on Sundays, but I don't want him impeeding my decisions when I do the ACTUAL parenting.  So, if I have any say he will not get any legal custody. [/quote]

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