Reply to Spouse asks you to come home from later

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again.  Also, things just get extra crazy when DH comes home. For various reasons.

He usually is short on patience already from his work day, and often has to finish work a bit.  Kids are exhausted by end of day, they are trying to get DH's attention in whatever way because they haven't seen him all day, whether positive or negative, and get upset if he's not paying attention.  Also DH is the wild fun friend who has a natural talent of bringing out the pent up crazy in kids and part of his routine is to roughhouse with them because it helps him get his frustrations from the day out as well.  He also gets a little upset if the kids don't give him a big warm welcome or get excited about him coming home, which I understand, but at the same time, sometimes the kids are just exhausted or distracted.  Also kids get extra punchy and borderline rude when their friends are over - especially to DH - it's like they are showing off that they can be rude to their dad for laughs.

So when DH gets home, I feed him and ask him about his day, remind the kids to be respectful to their dad or stop harassing him while he is trying to get his work done.  For me, while I'm at my max, it's just extra stuff on my plate I have to manage, and I am not good at managing multiple things at a time.  
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There's a lot to unpack here.  I suggest you and your husband go to therapy.  Both individually and alone.  The fact that your husband gets upset when his kids don't give him a big enough welcome when he comes home (?!?!?) is a major issue.  He's acting like a child, and it's clearly putting a lot of stress on you.  I'm assuming that you don't work?  You may want to have a discussion about the dynamic in your house unless you want to continue to be Betty Draper.  I mean, honestly, what does your husband do for you?  You feed him and ask about his day and wrangle the kids while he ... pouts that they aren't excited enough to see him?  This is a super messed up dynamic, OP, and I genuinely hope you get some help with it.[/quote]

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