Reply to Going to DIL's for first time for Christmas

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Poor OP, I hope you are still up for this visit! I’d be terrified by this point if I were you reading this thread.[/quote]

I'm not terrified. This is helpful. I still don't understand why it's bad for me to want to contribute more than just muffins and wine, but I'll just stick to that, as apparently I shouldn't be stepping on toes by wanting to contribute more. It's fine. I'll stay in my lane. [/quote]

You can't "understand" because you are putting yourself in a victim role when you in fact are not a victim. "I just want to be helpful by contributing! Why won't they let me do that? It's so not fair!!!" You are like a little kid upset that you can't get your way.

Change is hard.  Moving on from being the hostess to being a guest is a change and a transition. It doesn't mean you are less than, less important or are going to be forgot. You aren't being relegated to anything. You are being asked to contribute, to join in and be a part of the celebration.

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