Reply to If you are a housewife, how much does your spouse make?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don't assume that being a "housewife" is always a "choice."  There are many of us who made an initial choice to take care of the kids full time, then when we wanted to go back to work, there was a recession and even past the recession, no one will hire us.  Doesn't matter that you are a capable person.  Doesn't matter that you have an advanced degree.  In some ways, I understand that an employer will favor a person with recent experience over someone with past experience.

[b]But, after a certain number of years (and I don't mean 20), the work world just doesn't want women who have been out of the workforce.  We smile and pretend it is our "choice," but that's a cover for the fact that we have been rejected literally hundreds of times.[/b][/quote]

speak for yourself. Where I live (Manhattan suburbs), few women work and that's because all their husbands earn millions of dollars in finance.

When people don't need the money and even an extra $60k wouldn't make a difference in their lifestyle, they usually choose not to work.[/quote]

You're not very bright, are you?

The millionaire husband doesn't change the fact that nobody is going to hire these women, whether they want to work or not.  [/quote]

Not you are not that bright. The point is, these women are not even looking for a job. The thought hasn't crossed their minds in YEARS. They're sitting on millions of dollars. Why would they slave away for no reason?[/quote]

The reason I work is to contribute to society, to be productive, to have a more equal relationship with my husband, to not be financially dependent, to be a good role model for my daughter and sons, to learn new things everyday, to be challenged, to be part of a team, because I have a strong work ethic, because it gives me a life outside my role as a mother and wife. These are just some of the reasons.

[/quote]

This.  [/quote]

Once again you can do all of that absent financial independence without a paying job. (Depending on savings and family money, you might have financial independence as well.)[/quote]

[b]If you have a strong work ethic you are not a SAHM or you have extremely extenuating circumstances.  Why is that so hard to admit?[/b]  [/quote]

PP here with the DH who makes 2.5 million.  My first gut reaction was to take offense to this comment, but upon reflection I think you are right.  The fact is, the majority of people work to make money.  Do they enjoy work?  Perhaps, if they are lucky, but the endgame is more money, security, better lifestyle, etc.  I suppose if I had a crazy strong work ethic I would be back at work without regard to the salary (or the fact that it wouldn't affect our lifestyle), but there's nothing I love so much that I'm willing to work so hard just for the sake of it.  It's an interesting thing to think about.  The fact is, I didn't love my career before I quit to stay at home.  Perhaps if I had I'd feel differently.  That being said, I am well educated with several advanced degrees from Ivy League institutions.  I don't consider my education to be a "waste."  As opposed to working, I do like learning for the sake of learning.  I am an educated, intelligent citizen and that's not a bad thing.  [/quote]

I could have written this!  Though my DH doesn't make quite as much.

I used to be an academic, and I received my doctorate from an Ivy.  I now SAH, but there's no question I'm just as intellectually engaged in the world of ideas, and have written and published since quitting my job - but I (obviously) don't teach.  Does that mean I don't have a work ethic?  Do academics lack a work ethic because they get to spend the majority of their time reading and writing and "thinking"?  And by extension, perhaps anyone with a measly office job lacks a work ethic - after all, the real labor is done by the working class, farmers, migrant workers, etc., many of whom genuinely do think that the average middle-class office worker has NO IDEA what a day of HARD work is truly like.
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