Reply to MIL refuses to call DS the right name

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[quote=Anonymous]I think that the more you make this an issue, the bigger of an issue it becomes.

My dad was called one thing by his entire family and a COMPLETELY different name by his grandmother.  I don't know why.  I don't think he knows why.  None of us ever asked.

His mom, though, sounds a lot like you.  His mom was nuclear about it.  For the 40 years I knew her she always went on and on about it.  My dad says she was like that when he was growing up and definitely she maintained the habits when I knew her.  In fact it is my defining memory of her that she could not get over it.  But, then, everything in life was like that for her.  She was at heart an unhappy woman and it showed in how she addressed things like this.  In fact I think she was a lot like some young parents today - it was all about her needs and her boundaries and respect for her.  She was so busy looking for slights that she found them everywhere she looked and she couldn't enjoy what she did have, which was a healthy, happy boy.

My dad just went with the flow, though, and comes to see that this grandmother was his BIGGEST champion.  She was always there to back him up and she always came through when he needed help.  During his many life accomplishments as child and as an adult, she was the first one there and taking a front row seat waving the flag so to speak to watch him receive his honors.  She always called him by her name for him, which caused some people to look askance or wonder if she was all there, but my dad didn't care.  He loved her for who she was, flawed and all, because she showed her true colors in how she supported him.

I'm not attributing my great-grandmother's outstanding qualities to your MIL, OP, but I am suggesting that if you let this die down a little maybe it will all work out.  Perhaps she will realize she is being silly or perhaps not.  Either way it just isn't that important.  You call him Laslo and let her call him Ralph.  Oh, well, what's the diff?  There is NONE![/quote]

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