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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Think about how sad yout kids will be if you damage the relationship with their grandparents.[/quote]

That's crazy.  The grandparents can have a perfectly fine relationship even after OP refuses to provide support for an addict.  Using the kids would be a blackmail tactic.  Do you think that's right?

Only someone who has/had an addict relative can possibly understand how hard this situation is.

I watched my parents throw away thousands of dollars to keep my brother out of jail.  He'd never admit he had a problem until he was in trouble and then he'd cry and beg for help to get into a rehab program.  He'd complete it and celebrate with a drink.

My parents are in their 60s and have a 30-something adult child living with them because they just enable, enable, enable.  He has no license and has to rely on them or Uber for rides.  He has no credit card, so their credit card is attached to his Uber account.  My mom made a passing comment when I redoing my home about not turning an extra guest room into my office because when they were gone, it would be my responsibility to care for my brother.  I told her that was not happening under any circumstances.  I'm the only one in my family who calls him out on his addiction and doesn't enable him.  There's zero scenarios I can think of where I'd let him live with me.  It took a lot of therapy for me to realize that I matter and putting myself first doesn't mean that I care about others less.

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