Reply to I just found out why my DH has been treating me like crap for 3 years

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  So many comments to address but I have been busy since posting.  I cook almost all of our meals.  We go out to eat once a month at the most and get takeout even less often.  I have never been a very tidy person.  The house is clean but could be neater.  For the person above who suggested it, yes, both my mother and grandmother kept incredibly clean houses and both said in later years they wished they had not focused so much time on that and spent more time with their kids.  Since posting this, DH has fallen on the sword and I think this may be a turning point in our marriage.  Of course there is more behind the comments but it really hurt to question what I do all day  when I feel like I give it my all every day and night to the point of complete exhaustion.  I am still pursuing part time work as a possibility but I am much more hopeful now than when I originally posted.  Thank you for the helpful comments.[/quote]

Oh, OP.  I'm sorry.  When we were little, my dad was an associate at a big law firm trying to make partner and NEVER home.  He went out of town for a week once, and we didn't even know he was gone.  Anyway, the Christmas that I was 8 years old, my brother was 5, and my sister was 1, he got my mom piano lessons for Christmas because he thought she could use a new hobby since she was home all day.  She cried.   
When was she supposed to go?  When was she supposed to practice?  He was genuinely trying to be nice, but he had no idea what it is to take care of kids all day and how all-consuming it is.  Plus, they are always with you.  Doing it is hard enough.  Doing it and not having your partner recognize it is so much harder.

He would have done better to get her a babysitter a few hours a week and let her decide if she wanted to take piano lessons during that time or just relax a little.

I hope this is a turning point for you!

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