Reply to Are you offended when someone says they “didnt want someone else to raise my kids”?

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Reply to "Are you offended when someone says they “didnt want someone else to raise my kids”?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I work and I'm secure in my choices and not easily offended. However, no SAHM has ever said that to me, and I wonder what OP said to the SAHM to get that kind of response? [/quote]

I never heard anything like this when I was a working mom. There were times when I felt guilty for not having as much time with my kids but SAHMs didn’t say these rude comments to me.

I’m a SAHM now and I do get some rude comments by working moms. Some are back handed compliments like how it must be nice to have a rich husband so I can shop and travel as much as I want or how they could never stay at home all day or they couldn’t wait to go back to work because their brain wasn’t being used. I don’t really get bothered and move on. I don’t jab back.[/quote]

I’ve always worked and none of my SAHM friends have said this. I’ve had people talk to me about how their husband’s inflexible job combined with their inflexible job would have meant their child was going to be with a nanny 12 hours a day if they didn’t SAH or that when they cut back to PT to get flexibility they got paid less but were still responsible for a similar amount of work. I and other working moms I know have also been told by our female bosses (both with and without children) 100x times that they don’t know how we can parent well and work in our jobs, I have had men and women who I work with publicly question if I intended to quit when I had my third child, my friend was asked “what her goals were with work” after coming back from mat leave after having a third, we both had our bonuses docked pretty severely after taking 16 weeks of mat leave (different companies), and I have had childless 25 year olds on my team condescend to me about raiding kids, my priorities, and childcare. A 25 year old chided me last winter for not having a full time back up childcare provider when our nanny suddenly took a few days off to undergo testing for what her doctor thought was uterine cancer. This is actually the same person who, after three years of me saying that I can’t take meetings between 5:45-8, because I am doing dinner and bedtime with my kids, routinely schedules work meetings during that time (and I make myself available between 8-10 for meetings, when my kids are in bed). I’ve actually pretty much exclusively received sh*t from working women. [/quote]

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